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"… and Lo, didst a bunch of Big Folk fall from the clouds one day, with no clothing and tiny hairless hands -- which all the village elders proclaimed in unison as 'just too freaky.'

"The sudden appearance of the four naked giants, three males and one female, is a complete mystery. One of them bald, the mark of an Elder among our people, while another clearly cursed: he bears no nose.

"These sky-plopped nudists didst eventually awake and attempted communication, but in a language not for my wizened ears to understand. So I set out with the new arrivals to find our village Hero, whom I suspected would understand their strange tongue… but not before a tragic fate befell one of the four.

"And so it came to pass that 'Frank', 'Mike', and 'Allison' -- the remaining Big Folk -- met with our Hero, whereupon it didst seem they had crossed paths before, and greeted each other in what must be an ancient custom of their lands: by trying to pummeleth the crap out of one another.

"Now, I knowst only what the Hero has explained to me so far: that all of them didst escape from a wretched kingdom ruled mercilessly by a cruel and heartless despot named "Dah-monk", or "The Cahr-too Nyst". It seems that they had been prisoners for years, slaves to every depraved whim and wickedness that this Dah-monk could imagine. It has been told that the poor giants were even deprived of their precious child-making parts!

"But though I am pleased that our people can offer them sanctuary after such a pitiable existence, I fear that their arrival may have triggered a chain of unfortunate events. The Straw Men have been seen roaming beyond the desolate wastes of their dreaded Custard Dessert, clearly testing the bounds of the Fif Bricg Treaty. The Four-legged Folk grow agitated in the plains and forests, and portents of a new war weigh heavy on the chill gales from the North.

"And in the center of the looming maelstrom: a single hare with a message that could change our world."

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